In a major journalistic coup, your friendly Hantu Bola flers proudly bring you the former dictator of the country of Eye-Rack in a one-to-one interview.
HB: Good evening, sir.
SH: Good morning la.
HB: Sorry. We're still jet lagged. Thank you for seeing us on such short notice.
SH: Not a problem, since I have nothing to do these days, except for attending some illegitimate trail and posing for newspapers and magazines in my underpants. Let me tell you one thing. I am still the King.. Opps... President of Ira...
HB: Right. Let's get started. First off, we would like to compliment you on your latest clean shaven look. It looks good on you.
SH: Thank you. I was getting increasingly tired of the Santa Claus jokes.
HB: So... You seem happier today. What changed?
SH: Hahahaha. The World Cup, of course.
HB: Why? Iraq's not in it. Iran's in though. Are you rooting for them?
SH: Fuck those motherfuckers. Those infidels from across the pond. Oh yeah, not like your Malaysia is in it too.... Losers. Can't even beat Laos.
HB: Er, okay. Most Malaysians support England anyway...
SH: That's the problem right there! You people still follow your former colonial masters - worshipping them, begging for approval and attention. Those capitalist infidels!
HB: But, but, but...
SH: Ah! You know why I love the World Cup? I'll tell you why. America sucks at football.
HB: But they made it to the World Cup wor...
SH: That's because they are lucky. That CONCACAF nonsense is a joke. Anyone can beat those head-bobbing Canadians.
HB: Malaysia too?
SH: Er... Maybe not your boys. But, that Shebby Barger fella's team is quite good.
HB: Right. Back to the infide... err... America.
SH: They will lose every match. Get sent home in disgrace.
HB: Okay. We have to wrap it up here. Who do you think will win the World Cup this year?
SH: Trinidad and Tobago.
HB: You're serious?
SH: Never more so.
SH: I like that Yorke fler. He will win the golden boot and score 20 goals.
HB: Right... Thanks for your time, sir.
SH: You're welcome. If you'll excuse me, it's time for my regular bikini wax session.