June 09, 2006

Interview with Saddam Hussein

In a major journalistic coup, your friendly Hantu Bola flers proudly bring you the former dictator of the country of Eye-Rack in a one-to-one interview.

HB: Good evening, sir.

SH: Good morning la.

HB: Sorry. We're still jet lagged. Thank you for seeing us on such short notice.

SH: Not a problem, since I have nothing to do these days, except for attending some illegitimate trail and posing for newspapers and magazines in my underpants. Let me tell you one thing. I am still the King.. Opps... President of Ira...

HB: Right. Let's get started. First off, we would like to compliment you on your latest clean shaven look. It looks good on you.

SH: Thank you. I was getting increasingly tired of the Santa Claus jokes.

HB: So... You seem happier today. What changed?

SH: Hahahaha. The World Cup, of course.

HB: Why? Iraq's not in it. Iran's in though. Are you rooting for them?

SH: Fuck those motherfuckers. Those infidels from across the pond. Oh yeah, not like your Malaysia is in it too.... Losers. Can't even beat Laos.

HB: Er, okay. Most Malaysians support England anyway...

SH: That's the problem right there! You people still follow your former colonial masters - worshipping them, begging for approval and attention. Those capitalist infidels!

HB: But, but, but...

SH: Ah! You know why I love the World Cup? I'll tell you why. America sucks at football.

HB: But they made it to the World Cup wor...

SH: That's because they are lucky. That CONCACAF nonsense is a joke. Anyone can beat those head-bobbing Canadians.

HB: Malaysia too?

SH: Er... Maybe not your boys. But, that Shebby Barger fella's team is quite good.

HB: Right. Back to the infide... err... America.

SH: They will lose every match. Get sent home in disgrace.

HB: Okay. We have to wrap it up here. Who do you think will win the World Cup this year?

SH: Trinidad and Tobago.

HB: You're serious?

SH: Never more so.

HB: Why?

SH: I like that Yorke fler. He will win the golden boot and score 20 goals.

HB: Right... Thanks for your time, sir.

SH: You're welcome. If you'll excuse me, it's time for my regular bikini wax session.

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