Top 10 Excuses Why England Will Be Out Of The World Cup Before The Quarter Finals

1. David James bought Tomb Raider: Legend for PSP that just came out.
2. Too much sand on the penalty spot.
3. Lasagne was served for breakfast, lunch and dinner every single day.
4. Andy Gray had to mention that England has to hang on (with 20 minutes to go).
5. Sven got confused and thought that Ashley Cole was a striker and Joe Cole was a left back.
6. Sven lost his temper and kicked out at a boot lying on the floor. He missed, slipped and sprained his back.
7. Rio Ferdinand forgot to pee again. He was disqualified. Then again, maybe that will actually help England’s case.
8. Jamie Carragher wanted England to play like Liverpool. Kept pumping the ball forward to Michael Owen – who couldn’t reach them due to his great stature.
9. John Terry, Wayne Rooney and Jermaine Jenas missed the game as they were too engrossed in their poker game.
10. Peter Crouch played in every single game.