Lucky my Banana Republic

Liverpool and Men.United have been rivals since before stupid Adam ate the apple. Suffice to say, someone would probably find the cure for HIV first before we can stop feuding. Or a way for a woman to reach an orgasm in under 3 minutes with a man in the same room.

They think we hate them because they are successful. Actually, we hate them because they wouldn’t stop gloating. We didn’t hate Arsenal when they went through their unbeaten run. They had talent and we respect that.

If I were to write a profile on Men.United fans, I’d say, mostly, apart from the fact they gloat all the time, they taunt any teams who lost, whether the match had anything to do with them or not.

And when they lose, fuggedaboutit. They sulk, they spout bitterness. Sore losers in the likes of Jose Moanrinho. Because basically, they think they are the dog’s bollocks and they should win every bloody match they ever played. The sheer arrogance is offputting, to say the least. Poncy conceited farts the whole lot.

I’m old enough to have lived through Liverpool’s glory years. We were not that arrogant. Sure we were happy, ecstatic even. But we were never the arseholes who go around bragging all the time.

Then Fergit came along and started the Hate War going ‘Focking Liverpool’ every bloody opportunity he got. He took your team to what it is today. I hated him of course.

Many moons later, enter Moanrinho. He made Fergit look like a dear old man. And I began to appreciate Fergit’s biting statements. Let’s face it. The old man can be funny. While Moanrinho just make illogical statements that makes you laugh at him.

Having said all these, in the past few years, I have met some nice ManYoo fans. In life and online. Will wonders never cease.

Sure, we rib each other all the time. But it’s more good natured kind. I mean, we get the ribbing most of the time. Cause Liverpool is not the ‘big’ club that Manyoo is. Cool.

18 First Division Titles. 7 FA Cups .7 League Cups .5 UEFA Champions League Cups. 3 UEFA Cups.

No big deal. Sure we haven’t won the Jaguh Kampung title in 17 years. But we won our 5th CL just two years ago. Win some, lose some.

We are happy enough with our small club. We have lost a lot of battles. We can take the ribbing good naturedly. Like a man. Bloody hell, if we behave like some manure fans everytime we lost a match, we’ll end up in a loony bin.

Take their latest defeat. I wasn’t going to say anything but some of them, have made me think they have been taking lessons from Moanrinho. Sore losers or wot?

Pray tell. Are you lot so vicious out of embarassment?

Even foul-mouthed Fergit was gracious about the loss. And I would think he would be the most gutted. Since he hasn’t got that many years left to get Manure another treble.

But the fans? Fock me sideways.

You lost and you take the piss out of Liverpool? If that’s not bitterness, I don’t know what is.

I wouldn’t call our win over Chelshite lucky. They were the bigger team with the bigger dosh. They should have pwned us in 90. They didn’t. And they suck at penalties. How does that make us lucky?

As for West Ham. C’mon, they had a 2 goals lead (even one of them Carra donate to them) and they can’t protect it. They deserve to lose.

Likewise AC Milan. They couldn’t jaga their 3 goal lead. And we were lucky? Do you think coming back from 3 down is a walk in the park?

You got sodomised in San Siro. Take it like a man.

I tell you. You lot can’t survive being a Liverpool supporter.

You need to be made of sterner stuff. Resilience and sense of humour for starters.

Blimey. Even Arsenal who actually played in a CL final and lost to some dodgy refereeing is not this bitter.

Now, that’s class. Not to mention truly attractive football.

Saya yang menurut perintah Eyeris :p (now, can I post about owen next, pretty please? :p)