October 29, 2006

Crouching Fluke, Useless Commentators

I saw Peter Crouch's goal just now.

Finnan sent over a cross that was woefully short. SOMEHOW, all of Aston Villa's defenders failed to clear it, and it SOMEHOW managed to get to Peter Crouch.

Crouch lifts a leg, swings it, and SOMEHOW, manages to clip the ball with his fucking SHIN, and it bounces boing boing boing (ok, maybe a little faster than boing, boing, boing, more like boingboingboing), and it SOMEHOW manages to find its way into the Aston Villa goal.

Damn fluke of a goal if you ask me.

Now, here's the clincher. The commentator then says:






Now, I believe that a goal's a goal, no matter how it's hit. But to say that Crouch TOTALLY MEANT for the ball to clip his shin, and bounce awkwardly into goal like that is just fucking bollocks. A brilliant FLUKE maybe, but brilliant TECHNIQUE? Please lar.

I still fucking HATE Crouch, but somehow he keeps scoring the goals, flukes or no flukes. Maybe I should start hating the whole team as well, then they might start winning for once.

(Somehow, this line of thinking reminds me of that joke about the Man City fan who wanted to become a Man Utd fan just before he dies, because "Better one of THEM dies than one of US". heh.)

Oh well, a win's a win, and Kuyt's goal was fucking brilliant. the build up to Garcia's goal as well. Oh, but I still think it's time to put Hyypia to pasture. (ok, so he created Kuyt's goal, but heck, the fella just can't seem to keep up with ANY of the strikers in the EPL anymore.)

PS: Speaking of commentators, What else is Jamie Yeo good for on Football Extra besides giving (the mostly male) viewers some boobs to look at, and popping up occasionally with golden nuggets of football knowledge like "Now, lets take a break and show you how YOU can win some great prizes", "Malaysian Airlines flies to yadayada three, four, five times a day", and "Welcome back toFootball Extra with me and Jien"?

Oh yeah, boobies conquers all. Yay.

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