The New West Ham United

Goalkeeper:





Roy "Save it only if it's already a goal' Carroll








Defence:





Amnot "Rio" Ferdinand












Hayden Mullet













Danny Gaban






Midfield:







Lee Boxer









Yogi Bearnayoun











Javier Mashimaro









National Rice-Cooker







Strikers:






Bobby Zam-Zam Alakazam











Carlton Cocks












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