September 20, 2006

Jerry MaGuire lives!

That Jerry MaGuire guy is really something isn't he? First he helped Cuba Gooding Jr resurrect his Duhmehrican football career, now he's doing pro-bono consultancy work for REAL (in all senses of the word) football players.

For instance, David Beckham apparently called MaGuire for advice when he was dropped from the England team, and MaGuire's alter-egomaniac was more than willing to help him.

"When I got to America I phoned Tom. He's a great guy to be able to speak to because he is a very positive-minded person. It is good to have people around you at that point."

After reading this line, all of a sudden, mental images of Beckham on the phone, shaking his sarong-clad tush, screaming SHOW ME THE MONEY while talking to Cruise flashed through my mind.


Anyway, on with the quotes:

"He talked about everything I had done in the World Cup, about the goal I scored and the goals I set up. He said I was a great player, that I played for Real Madrid, I've got a healthy family and three boys and a wife who love me to bits. "


Yes, apparently Ethan Hunt knows about the game they call 'soccer'. Now, everyone, pick your jaw up from the floor.

Speaking of Ethan Hunt, chances are we won't be seeing HIM again, since he just got kicked out of his ego-massaging role in the Mission Impossible franchise (probably because he offered Beckham a role in the third movie.... yeah, I know).

But on the bright side (for Beckham, that is), it frees up Hunt from his usual mask-wearing, terrorist-fighting duties to help Beckham with HIS impossible mission of getting back in the England squad. With Hunt on his side, McClaren beware!

Anyway, those two are a match in heaven aren't they? Let's see...
  • One got kicked out of the IMF team, the other got kicked out of the England team
  • One jumps around on sofas screaming his wife's name, the other runs around in sarongs and his wife's knickers
  • One is a prominent scientologist, the other probably doesn't know what science is.
  • One named his daughter Suri, the other named his kids Brooklyn and Romeo
  • One dumped Nicole Kidman for Penelope Cruz, the other had another kid and called him Cruz.

Get these two a room already!

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