I KNOW THAT THIS MESSAGE WILL COME TO YOU AS A SURPRISE. I AM THE BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER IN BANK OF AFRICA (BOA), OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO. I HOPED THAT YOU WILL NOT EXPOSE OR BETRAY THIS TRUST AND CONFIDENT THAT I AM ABOUT TO REPOSE ON YOU FOR THE MUTUAL BENEFIT OF OUR FAMILIES.
I NEED YOUR URGENT ASSISTANCE IN TRANSFERRING THE SUM OF (USD$25) MILLION TO YOUR ACCOUNT WITHIN 10 TO 14 BANKING DAYS. THIS MONEY HAS BEEN DORMANT FOR YEARS IN OUR BANK WITHOUT CLAIM. I WANT THE BANK TO RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEAREST PERSON TO OUR DECEASED CUSTOMER (THE OWNER OF THE ACCOUNT) DIED ALONG WITH HIS SUPPOSED NEXT OF KIN IN AN AIR CRASH SINCE JULY, 2000.
I DON'T WANT THE MONEY TO GO INTO OUR BANK TREASURER ACCOUNT AS AN ABANDONED FUND. SO THIS IS THE REASON WHY I CONTACTED YOU SO THAT THE BANK CAN RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE DECEASED CUSTOMER. PLEASE I WOULD LIKE YOU TO KEEP THIS PROPOSAL AS A TOP SECRET AND DELETE IT IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED.
UPON RECEIPT OF YOUR REPLY, I WILL GIVE YOU FULL DETAILS ON HOW THE BUSINESS WILL BE EXECUTED AND ALSO NOTE THAT YOU WILL HAVE 30% OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED SUM IF YOU AGREE TO HANDLE THIS BUSINESS WITH ME? AND 10% WILL BE SET ASIDE FOR ANY EXPENSES THAT WARRANT ON THE PROCESS BEFORE THE FUND GET INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT SUCH AS TELEPHONE CALLS BILLS (ETC).
I am very interested in your story. Wow! 30% of $25million! That's like $7.5 million! I have plans to buy a football club in my country. You know football? Yah, my friend Shebby Singh, he was a good football player and can make good manager. We need money to remove some current idiots ruining my hometown club. Would you also be interested in investing your 60% in our great club called UPB MyTeam? We are very much interested also in buying a new goalkeeper to replace our fat goalkeeper with German goalkeeper Jens Lehman? We hear he is retiring soon and hope to bring him to our country to play. Also we wish to purchase young and upcoming star Titus Bramble to help marshall our defence and emulate our legendary Shebby Singh.
So yes, I am very much interested. Maybe you can give more details. I only have one concern - I am very much afraid of people cheating me. There have been a lot of silly people in my country getting cheated. How sure can I be? You said that 10% of the money ($2.5 million) will be spent on telephone bills? That is a lot. Are you sure your phone companies are not cheating you? There is a prepaid mobile phone plan in my country that only charges 35 cents/min called DiGi prepaid. Maybe you should consider that option so we can save more money and perhaps with $2 million left we can purchase another footballer - Kieran Richardson - you know him? Good player that one.
So please you reply me, and then give me details then we can proceed.
PS: Eh, which one of you two was it that replied, huh? I thought we agreed to keep Hantubola a strictly non-profit thingy? How come want to go buy football club wan? What else have you two been conspiring about behind me huh? huh? huh?