Remember THIS? Well, here I have a sample of some actual 'running commentary' given by the two Ah Bengs sitting behind me during the Liverpool-Portsmouth game in Hong Kong (Cantonese has been translated as roughly as possible into English....)
Ah Beng 1: Tiu, Lei Wa Pou sure win wan lar! Po Si Mou Fu very char mar TIU!!!
Ah Beng 2: OI! Don't say like that lar TIU! I bet one hundred on this you know! TIU NIA SENG! Faster lar Lei Na! Kick the ball also so long! Ha.. ha... HAIYOR TIU! Pan Nan why do that! Fast fast ZHAM (cross) the ball lar! TIU! ZHAM ZHAM!!! TIU! What he waiting forrr!!!!
Ah Beng 1: Haiyor, it's Sou Kam Pou marrr. Tiu nia seng how to go pass?
Ah Beng 2: TIU! Gu Zi tiu so char! Don't Know how to shoot meh? Go Home Lar TIU!!!!
Ah Beng 1: Keeper Chim See very good today lar TIU.
Ah Beng 2: PUT ON Je La Tat lar TIU! Wait wait for what lar!!! HAAA! HAAA! Mou Mou! hahahaha! Why they call him Mou Mou! A lot of hair is it!!! TIU! What lar how you want to go in! Sou Kam Pou lar how to pass!!!!
Ah Beng 1: Ha they put in To Le Si now. sure goal wan.
Ah Beng 2: Tiu!!! To Le Si so char wan, kenot even control ball. USELESS LAR TIUNIA SENG!!!! Eight more minutes only put on Je La Tat! What he can do!!!
Ah Beng 1: TIU LIKE SHIT ONLY. SO BORING TIU! PENALTY!!!
Ah Beng 2: TIU HAI To Le Si go and miss! Buy him so Expensive for what? GO HOME LAR! TIU!!!!
So now we know what would happen if ESPN were taken over by Ah Bengs...