February 08, 2007

baptism of a new soccer club

After happily selling their backsides to the highest bidder, the BOD of Liverpoo Soccer Team (they shall be known by that name until the nice guys at Football365 think of a suitable nick name, or until you get to the bottom of this article) then went on a charm offensive to brainwash the scum that all is well. And, surprisingly, those hubcap stealers did not seem to understand the intricate conniving ways of this deal, thus putting rest to the notion that 'It takes a thief to catch a thief'.

It is either that, or the Liverpoo Soccer Team fans have been embarassed beyond words. You see, after consistently dissing Chelski's sugardaddy for the past 3 years, KARMA became a real big bitch and bit the scum's backside big time. Liverpool Soccer Team have now also found themselves not one but TWO sugardaddies who happily wiped out their debts and will now no doubt pour money into the club for them to buy actually buy decent players that aren't actually gay. That is why nobody is actually making any noise about this takeover - as Jerzy Dudek kindly demonstrates to Diego Forlan in the picture on the right - WHO WOULD SAY NO TO A FREE GIFT?

Some plastic Liverpoo Soccer Team fan asked me why I hate Liverpool so much instead of Chelsea who has been stealing all our glory in recent time. Besides the inane point of me being a Manyoo fan who is SUPPOSED to hate everything related to our new soccer team brothers, it is also for the simple reason that it's easier to concede defeat to Chelsea. I would rather they win the Quadruple than Liverpool stealing yet another trophy, no matter how insignifant it is. The logic is simple - whatever trophy Chelsea wins - I can say, "Aaah so what? Anybody can win anything with a sugardaddy!" See, with all that cash inflow, they are EXPECTED to win.

Yes, yes Manyoo had all that money and bought all those players too. Bla bla bla....but we bought them out of their own money. Liverpoo were some 40 million quid in debt before their sugardaddies came in and bailed them out and financed their (would be) new stadium. This is good for us Manyoo fans actually, because the next time Liverpoo do win another Mickey Mouse Cup, I can claim that it is a hollow victory carved out of some greenbacks. ANd when Manyoo does win the league this year, I can gloat to you suckers that we did it INSPITE OF being cursed with a 600 million quid debt.

HAH!

And since the scum are moving to their new stadium, that stupid red sign can now serve a more useful purpose.


Don't you agree that a sign in the middle of a field that says "This is a field" is just as inane as having that sign in the stadium!? I know that footballers are stupid, but which kind of dumbshit doesn't know where he is 5 minutes before kickoff? You would have thought that people from the slums are usually street smart. Do Scousers get lost that easily? Maybe that is why they keep getting lost everytime they say they are "turning the corner".

But let's not waste anymore time and get to the part where the Yankees unveil their new logo and baptise their new name.

Ladies and gentlemen,

Give a very warm American greeting to

THE LIVERPOOL STEALERS SOCCER TEAM*




*not to be confused with the Pittsburg Steelers Football Team

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