July 11, 2009

Why Adebayor is the hottest transfer target this summer

* Emmanuel Adebayor is one of the most feared, dangerous and fertile strikers in Europe.

* .... has a chance-to-goal ratio of 0.0045, bettered by only 453 players last season

* He is a tender and considerate lover

* Emmanuel Adebayor is a 20th century football icon. He is the most famous man in Togo and many women want to bear his children.

* His reputation as a warrior/gladiator has been earned through outstanding displays of both skill and physical courage.

* Emmanuel believes in God and puts his success down to his faith but does not blame God when he misses an easy chance in front of a goal.

*Brand Value: Fragrant, machine-washable, exotic, backwards compatible, definitely not lazy, afraid of ghosts.

* He is ultra professional, never late for training, extremely good at dancing which makes other people laugh, popular with all team mates (although a natural aversion to Danes comes with all Togonian footballers) and a true ambassador of the game.

If you want more information on how to Adebayorise your team, read here. Seriously a hoot, to quote Jeeves.

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