August 13, 2007

Solid Defense Earns Men.United Point (and other drunken stories)

KUALA LUMPUR: Four Ghost Balls were at Magnificent Fish and Chips Bar on Sunday to watch (on a tiny TV) plucky American soccer team Men.United put up a solid defensive display, shutting out fancied English giants Reading at Old Trafford stadium today and restricting the visitors to a mere 3 shots on target while mustering an impressive 22 shots themselves.

The nil nil draw was a disaster for Reading, who were hoping to have converted at least one of their 3 chances like Sunderland did on Saturday, but unfortunately, the Men.United defence, marshalled by the awesome substitutes of John O'Shea and Darren Fletcher, were up to the task.

Men.United fan Vincent said that the referee was totally bias against Men.United, and gave the excuse that his team was playing without an out-and-out striker in the second half, while completely ignoring the fact that Reading were playing with 10 men for about 20 minutes.

Vincent was saying this in between stuffing his mouth with potted mackeral while swigging whiskey and enduring complaints of "WHY ARE THERE NO GOALS" from Tigerjoe throughout the match.

Rumours that the Men.United manager was playing for a draw and hoping to win on penalties were unfounded.

In other news, lowly Russian team Chelski also managed to sneak a 3-2 win against mighty English opposition Birmingham City, who were determined to show that they, unlike rivals Aston villa, could get some points on opening day.

Chelski prevailed thanks to a strike by Michael Assien, who took advantage of the fact that the Brum keeper was a dumbass who should have saved that shot.

Oh, and the MSSM Arsenal Team managed to win as well, no thanks to some wonderfully comical goalkeeping by Jens Lehman.

That's all for tonight. HIC!

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